You don’t have to prove yourself…

QUESTION:

… I would like for you to explain why your product is superior to
[another guru's] dating program. Just to give you heads up ~ I’ve
already heard through an independent source that [another guru] is
in the top five ~ but not the No.1

———————
CARLOS:

Occasionally I get letters like this, asking me to “prove myself”
in what I provide for men. As if I’ve got some clinching reason
other than the immense amount of information I provide on my sites
or in the newsletters.

They read newsletter after newsletter … “great advice,” they
say… “but, prove it….”

This is the kind of personality that will never be satisfied. No
proof will do, because they’re already looking for reasons for
something to NOT work instead of work.

Women often ask me this, too. They say, “You’re a dating advisor?
What background do you have? What are your credentials?”

Again, they are asking me to “prove” myself.

I suspect that people (especially women) are asking you to qualify
yourself all the time. And I’ll answer them the way I would anyone
else that doubts what I have to offer.

“Explain yourself…”

“Prove yourself…”

I say… NO.

You’ll find the Doubting Thomas type EVERYWHERE in life. Prove it,
prove it, they say. “Because until you do,” their REAL thought
process goes, “I don’t have to change or risk finding out that I’m
wrong.”

So I say:

As a rule, I don’t qualify my materials against other products out
there. My quality and reputation stands on its own.

If you’re interested, you are welcome to review the genuine
testimonials from guys who have loved our Alpha Man program (and
others) here: http://clicks.aweber.com/z/ct/?JKO7b9R3uXMob9S5afZEYg

And all of my products carry a guarantee, so you can’t go wrong.

Either you’ll believe that these guys are really changing their
lives for the better, or you won’t. But I don’t put myself up for
approval for everyone that wants me to ‘prove it.’

This is part of the Alpha Mindset that will also get you more women
in your life. Take it from me. Don’t get caught up in the game of
having to justify yourself to everyone. Being put on the wrong side
of this is the way to sink your self-esteem.

I live this every day. And you’ll want to when you experience the
world with a new view. I’m not trying to be arrogant or insulting.
I just want to illustrate how easy it is to get caught up in
another person’s frame.

Don’t be one of those people who tries to avoid change by demanding
proof of everything first.

Put the wood in first to get heat from a fire. Not the other way
around.

The proof is in the results.

Doubters are never do-ers.

—————-
THE DVDs ARE HERE!

Did you hear?

The DVDs were just released on Friday! If you didn’t get the
original notice, you can get a look at the program here:

http://clicks.aweber.com/z/ct/?B01Xm3yP_zW0NRQiEpj.CQ

________

QUESTION:

Carlos, I met a girl a couple of weeks ago and we went out on a
date that got pretty hot. I think her interest level is probably
still fluid at this stage of the game. I wanted to bring in
something unexpected and add that adventure to the mix today by
calling in the morning to set up a spontaneous lunch date. She
didn’t answer so I left a message. My question is how to handle
this scenario best.

I know that if I just say “call me back” that it gives her too
much power and puts me on the waiting end but if I don’t say
something than there is a 0% for her to call back before lunchtime.
I left a message (with a confident tone) like this “Hey, Jennifer -
as it turns out today I have some free time so I thought I would
call to see how your day is going and chat for a few minutes. I
don’t know what your schedule is like so call if you get the chance
- if not I will call tonight ‘maybe’ or tomorrow night. Goodbye
Jennifer”

Anyways, this is the best thing that I could come up with but I
find myself running into this scenario often where I want to set up
something spontaneous with a girl. Any idea on when I should
actually call her back if she doesn’t return my message if at all?

- F

—————————

CARLOS:

This is always a dilemma for guys once they realize how this sort
of power play starts to arise between men and women.

It’s important to be spontaneous with women, however, and you need
to have a battle plan for this situation.

The key is to take it away just as fast as you offer it. If she
answered, you’d offer her your little mini-adventure. If she
doesn’t answer, you leave her a message letting her know what she
missed out on.

Here’s what I’d do in this situation:

“Hey, Jennifer… Here I was going to offer you a wild little
adventure to break up the monotony of your week, and you missed
out… Well, don’t kick yourself too much for missing out on it…
I’ll tell you more about this place later in the week.”

CLICK.

And then, to make this really work, you better go there with
another friend (male or female). When you talk to her, you can then
be sincere when you talk about your adventure to this little lunch
spot with your “friend.” Don’t tell her the gender of this friend.
Wait for her to ask who you went with… then you say:

“Are you afraid I went with another woman? You’re jealous, aren’t
you? That’s so cute!” And simply don’t answer her question.

The bottom line is that if she’s not there, SHE missed out.

If you want her to call back, you must give her a reason to WANT
to call back.

Curiosity often does the trick.

———-
A reader comments:

Hey Carlos,

I never knew your mom past away man. Hey we’ve noticed how
sometimes after a person greatest success, is a great failure, or
low point. I think that was good part of it right there.

I just finished watching the video with all the interviews, and
even though I haven’t meet you personally, through your site,
newsletters, personal e-mails, and e-books, I can see all those
qualities that those men mentioned, such as professional,
unpretentious, and genuine. They all glow from your work.

One thing that I noticed is that I love how you tell of your real
life experiences, before you got to where you are, and where you
are now. Being so, myself and others can confidently say that we
can relate to you. That, and another thing that’s important is how
you present your work. It’s well rounded, very general and broad,
you don’t focus on certain areas, you allow men to analyze many
area’s of there live, point those area’s in the right direction, to
make there life successful and stable for women to join and share.

Keep it up.

Thank you for what your done. Dating Black Book, Alpha Man…

For what you’re doing- (R.E.A.L GAME).

And what’s to come……

- Victor
———————–

CARLOS:

I appreciate your comments more than you can know. And how
appropriate that your name means WINNING. Your attitude screams
“winner”, not “whiner.”

When I set out on this mission years ago, I knew that chasing women
was important, but that there was MUCH more to the story. That’s
when I created the Secrets of the Alpha Man Program. A real-life
primer on how to be a MAN first, and then the women will follow.

When you do it the other way … chasing success with women to
fill a hollow self-image, well…

I’m reminded of some words from “DUNE”:

“Many have tried…”
“Tried and Failed?”
“They tried and died.”

If you base your success with women on the wrong foundation, your
integrity and self-esteem will die, too.

One of the things you’ll notice is that:

1) I almost never whine about the competition, or dis them.

2) I don’t brag about being the “first” or the “Greatest” or the
“one and only” (even when I am :) . I don’t need to pump up my ego
or be Mr. Salesguy. I just want to spread the word and unplug as
many guys from the Matrix as possible.

3) I reveal personal details to you because I want you to
understand that I’m not some “high and mighty” pickup artist. I’m
just a man. And I feel I’ve got some valuable information to share
with you.

That last one is important to me.

I don’t mind showing you these things because I want you to
understand what women are REALLY attracted to.

And that’s REAL men.

And if you’d like to learn more about REAL Game and the successful
attitudes of an Alpha Man, you should take a look at the program
that will put you on the path - The Secrets of the Alpha Man.

http://clicks.aweber.com/z/ct/?P66T3Tr7bbpa1J3BIqWxyw

Just remember: Every man is self-made, but only the SUCCESSFUL
admit it.

I’ll be back with more advice soon …

- Carlos Xuma