Tyler On Destroying Approach Resistance

It’s that time again.

I know you’ve been waiting for it all month.

That’s right, it’s TYLER TIME!!!

Every so often, I turn the spotlight over to Tyler and give
him an outlet for his latest rants and ramblings.

Tyler is the Co-Founder of Real Social Dynamics, who has been
the creative mastermind and main public speaker at dozens of
seminars worldwide.

A graduate of the prestigous Queens University in Canada, Tyler
is a recreational ice-hockey player, and avid reader.

The foundational principles, concepts, and lessons of Real
Social Dynamics all center around advanced material Tyler
created while traveling around the world and analyzing male
and female interactions.

After writing thousands of articles on dating, fashion, and
nightclubs, Tyler began teaching at Real Social Dynamics
Classroom Seminars, and then taking students out at night to
become their personal wingman and instructor in the world’s
hottest venues to meet beautiful women during the day and
night.

From demonstrating his ability to captivate Playboy Models and
Miss America Beauty Pageant Contestants in front of large
groups of students, to helping students get the women of
their dreams, Tyler developed more street-credibility for his
findings and analysis on attraction than anyone else in the
world.

Whenever I have a conversation with him, I end up walking away
with a whole host of new insights and ways of looking at
whatever situation we discussed.

Frequently dense, his essays might take several repeated
readings before people absorb the whole meaning, but it’s
always worth it.

Of course, I’d be a fool to overlook this talent. That’s why
once a month or so, I ask Tyler to write a little something
for our newsletter.

This month, he goes all stream-of-consciousness with some
tasty bits and morsels. Enjoy.

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Thanks Jeffy. What follows are some random things I’ve
jotted down over the past week while I’ve had some
downtime. They’re not necessarily connected, but I feel
they’re practical and immediately applicable, so take
them for what they’re worth.

*** Smooth Resistance Counters Early On Approach ***

When a very attractive girl won’t open up to me, I always do
the same kind of thing.

When I say “won’t open”, I mean that she’s trying to put on a
front like she doesn’t think I’m cool or like the
conversation isn’t cool enough for her. I know that if I
continue on the thread, I’m losing value because if I’m
willing to talk to someone who is fronting with me then I’m a
bit of a tool.

Occasionally I will continue on as if I don’t realize that
she’s fronting, because that would sub-communicate something
to the effect that I never have people not respond well to me,
and that it doesn’t occur to me because its not in my reality.
I may also just project my voice in a way that’s steady
enough, that there is no choice but for them to acknowledge.

More often though, I might say something like “You’re from New York, aren’t you?” Then I’ll turn to my wing and start
laughing, and say something to the effect of “Dude, this is
too hard core. I can’t handle this,” or “This is how my
little sister talks to my dad when she’s trying to get money.”
or “Whoa.. Personality storm” or “What’s up with this?” or
anything of that nature.

In addition to this, I’m also often inclined to just look at
her like she’s a complete retard, and turn to my friend and
keep talking. I specifically do this when she’s giving me some
kind of flack.

Now take note here, because the difference between this
working and not working is whether or not you’re creating a
tension loop where she’s wanting to show you how cool she is
by blowing you off.

Like, if the girl was about to take pleasure in blowing you
off, and you blow her off before she can do it to you, she
has that tension there that she wanted to interact with you.

It might have been that her desire to interact with you was
to tool you, but remember that it was still a desire to
interact with you. So that unresolved tension can still
manifest in a positive direction, because the fact that she
is reacting to you puts her in your frame.

From there, and without hesitation, I’ll immediately turn my
body in the face of my wing and start having the most
phenomenally witty, hysterical, interesting conversation.

We’re laughing, and having a great time. All of a sudden,
we’re the coolest guys in the club, and she’s the puppydog
wanting in.

I really want to emphasize here, that it never looks like I’m
trying too hard to seem this way. It looks completely
legitimate. I am not one of those guys talking a little too
loud, trying to make the girl hear that I’m blowing her off.
That is transparent. I say it to my wing, not her.

She has to partially strain to hear it, which makes it very
legitimate.

Most often, it looks so legitimate, that my wing is convinced
that I’m really blowing the girl off. Even after I’ve done it
countless times, he’s convinced that this time is for real.

And that’s *my wing*, let alone the girl.

This element is so important, in order for it to work.

The girl will typically say “What were you asking me about
before?” I’ll look over at her for a second, and keep talking
with my wing. This resembles what a girl looks like when a guy
who lacks value tries to talk to her.

Typically, she’ll start grabbing my arm and flirting with me.
If she’s drunk, she may try to make out with me.

From there, I proceed as normal. Done properly, I’ve found
that it conveys phomenal amounts of value, and thus really
sparks attraction.

Strangely, this kind of thing has been the start of several
relationships with some really cool and attractive girls. I
suppose that it goes to show how important it can be at times,
to be able to plow through socially conditioned resistance.

*** Creating Polarity in the Interaction ***

One of the major skills as a player is creating a polarity in
the energy with whatever girl you talk to.

It is a natural thing that just happens, and perhaps it
happens with both guys and girls.

It is like, you talk to the girl, and she’s intrigued. Before
you’ve even really said anything. There is something in the
energy that makes her feel like if she talks to you that
something will happen.

It is like something in your voice, your face, and the way
you carry yourself. Perhaps how clearly you speak. Or perhaps
it comes from having talked to so many girls, that you can’t
distinguish them anymore and when you talk to a girl who you
don’t know it feels like you already know her, and she can
pickup on the subtle cues.

And because you normally bring such an awesome energy to the
girls that you normally talk to, there is something radiating
off of you that says, “This will be interesting.”

If I ask a girl for the time, she’ll try to talk to me
further. If I ask for directions, the same thing. And of
course, if I use an opinion opener, I definitely get the same
thing.

That’s a good thing.

But when it can be a problem is whenever anyone introduces me
to a girl that they’re with.

As soon as I open my mouth, if I talk “normally” as I have
trained myself to do, the girl will try to push a
conversation with me. And if I pull away, guess what - she’ll
push even harder.

The only way to avoid it is to make my voice monotone and to
be very friendly. I do this when I meet the girls of my
friends all the time. I’ll just say something like “Hi, how
are you? Cool. It’s really nice to meet you. Have an awesome
time.”

Bam, I’m out of there, before anything stupid happens.

This skill is something that all true players have, and it
accounts a lot for what we’d call “natural” game. Perhaps it
comes from knowing that I can make a girl laugh so hard that
she’ll pee her pants, at any point. Perhaps it comes from
knowing that she will inevitably be so reactive to my frame
that I can sink her into it and that it will be a ride that
she’s not going to forget.

There’s just something about it.

It’s the same thing that makes girls come up to me that I
haven’t seen in over a year, and remember my name and tell me
that I bought a pair of jeans from them in x-size and x-brand.

Did we talk? Apparently not. But it doesn’t matter. It’s
“like” we talked. It’s just “like that.”

Likewise, it is the thing that lets me play really aloof, and
get hit on like crazy.

Like, I can walk into a friend’s house for a get-together,
and the girls will all try to talk to me. I can just sit
there, almost like a woman, and just get hit on.

I can let the girl work me, and she’ll feel better about it
because the whole qualification thing won’t be a problem since
she had to convey all of her personality to me just to get my
attention. There won’t be a flake on this one. It’s totally
solid.

It’s that same skillset that lands girls in your bed within an
hour of meeting them. That secret-society thing, where it’s
just so obvious that you’re one of the people who “gets it.”

And you have that energy, and everyone else around you looks
like a dork in comparison unless they have it too.

There’s something about it. I’m never sure how to describe it.
But the effect is there and it is obvious. It’s something that
all good players cultivate over time.

On the most subtle of Subtle of SUBTLE levels, it comes from
being 100% in your own frame. Not being reactive to anything
that she is doing at any level that could be neediness in
any way.

You can see it in the most subtle ways of asking someone for
the time, or when you go over to a friend’s house and you are
totally comfortable there and the fact that there are girls
around means absolutely nothing to you. I’m not totally sure
how to explain it.

*** Taking Advantage of Peak States ***

I wanted to point out a tendency that I’ve had in the past,
which I benefited from correcting.

If you’re feeling down, you may have a tendency to want to
call your girls to cheer you up. Perhaps you’re a bit bored
and want a state change, or perhaps its out of a mild
neediness that you’re not even aware of.

One thing that I realized was that the best time to call all
my girls is the exact time when I’m least inclined: When I’m
feeling great.

For example, if I’ve just had sex, I’m probably not going to
be thinking “I need to go follow up with my numbers.” But if
I’m the kind of guy who feels really chilled out and positive
after sex, then that could actually be a great time to do my
follow ups.

Or say that I’m hanging out with my friends at the mall, and
we’re joking around and having fun, I’m probably not thinking
to follow up with my girls. But again, that is a great time.

The other side of this is that if you’re always looking for a
state-boost to follow up with girls, that can mess you up
because you become “state-dependent.”

In that regard, I think it’s important not to give these
things too much focus.

Like, if a girl left me a message, I personally wouldn’t wait
until I’m in good state to call her back. I’ve internalized my
way of interacting with women as who I am, so state isn’t
necessarily the first thing that I’m focused on at this point
in my learning curve.

But at the same time, if you’re going to follow up with 10 or
20 girls, you’re pretty much exhausting your entire list that
you’ve gone out all week to scoop up. That being the case, I
find that it doesn’t hurt to do it at a time when you’re
flowing. That way, all the funny/interesting/alpha stuff is
just popping out of your mouth in a natural way, and most of
your girls will want to meet up.

-Tyler

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Thank you so much, Tyler. Food for thought indeed.

What you’ve seen so far in these newsletters is just
the tip of the iceberg. During the RSD bootcamp you’ll be
DELUGED with MOUNTAINS of killer, field-tested tactics and
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Bar none, this is THE BEST way to get your game to top speed
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follow that instinct and learn more here:

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Here’s what a recent attendee of one of our London programs
had to say:

____________________________________________________________

“Hey,

You guys did an great job this weekend, you all have
different styles, and it was awesome learning something
from each of you.

The first night with Alex, Mike and Todd was pretty eye
opening. I learned that the social responses I was getting
were caused by me, and that I could control what happened.

The second night I wanted to work on physical escalation,
and Tim taught me some cool kino games to play with the
girls, and Roxanna showed me how to lead the girls around,
and control the interaction.

The third night was definitely the highlight, and where it
all started coming together. Winging with Tyler was
awesome, I learned to act more natural and unreactive, and
it had profound results. My sets were lasting longer, and
the girls ended up gaming me. This was a huge realisation
for me, and was basically the main thing I wanted to get
out of the program - to be able to socialise naturally with
whoever I choose.

Now I know how I can get from cold approach, to making out,
to going home with a girl in the same night.

Thanks again guys, it’s been an awesome weekend.

-Adam”

____________________________________________________________

And ok, let me say a couple words about our new seminar
product:

THE SUPERCONFERENCE.

The Superconference was an idea hatched by Tyler himself.
Over the course of the past few years, he’s spent THOUSANDS
upon THOUSANDS of hours in the field, seeing how his
theories stack up against REALITY.

As a result, you’re not going to find anyone with a more
complete understanding of the social matrix and how it
functions.

Not anywhere.

Now, Tyler’s taken all of this knowledge and condensed it into
an easy-to-understand two day seminar that tells you POINT-BLANK
how to meet, attract and close the deal with any attractive
woman you see, any time, anywhere.

This guy’s the real deal, player. To learn more about what the
Superconference covers and when it’s coming to your city,
visit here:

http://www.realsocialdynamics.com/n/seminars.asp

All right, I’m beat. I’m gonna go take a nap.

Talk to you soon.

Sincerely,

Jeffy, Executive Coach
REAL SOCIAL DYNAMICS