Game on Cruise Control

You know, a lot of the time, when I’m not living my active
lifestyle, I’ll surf the internet and screw around on various sites.
Some of these happen to include mainstream, non-pickup related
community forums.

The other day, I was doing just that, and some random dude asked me,
“Where is a good place to pick up girls besides the club/bar?”

I chuckled to myself and cracked my knuckles in anticipation of what
I was about to write.

My response:

“Union Square
Haight Street
The airport
The bike shop
Bed, Bath and Beyond
Whole Foods
Taqueria Cancun
Cala Foods
24 Hour Fitness
The drycleaners
Movie theater
The bank
The hardware store
Pizza Hut
Union Street
Outside my landlord’s office
In traffic
Palace Steak House
Puerto Alegre
Post office
On BART
*** Dress For Less
Veterinarian office
Salvation Army
At my weed dealer’s house
Floorcraft nursery
Home Depot
Fifth and Mission Parking Garage
Bus stop
Jack in the Box
Mels Diner
Powell and Market
Stonestown Mall
Golden Gate Park
The gas station
On the bus
AT&T Park
At my house
Rolling Stock on 18th and S. Van Ness
City Hall
Powell and Market
Ferry Building
Fisherman’s Chode
Best Buy
Petco
Amoeba Records
Mission Police Station
Brain Wash
Jiffy Lube
Office Depot
Kristi Yamaguchi Ice Rink
Bloomingdale’s
Church
The Kiehl’s counter
Cooking class
Safeway
Ocean Beach.
Vintage/consignment clothing stores
The Farmers Market
Marina Green
Crissy Field
The Warming Hut
The Grove Cafe (both of them)
Lombardi Sports
Dolores Park

I could go on, but you get the idea.”

So then this other dude chimes in, “Jeff, you cruise like a gay
man.”

I was like, hells yeah beezach!

You can’t turn this shizz off.

My game is on CRUISE CONTROL.

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